caffienekitty: (smirk)
caffienekitty ([personal profile] caffienekitty) wrote2009-05-27 10:49 pm

The Case of Chaos Vs the Answering Machine.

The Case of Chaos Vs the Answering Machine

You decide.

Kitty-cat Court is now in session


Plaintiff - Answering Machine

The Plaintiff: Answering Machine. Loyal, lonely, and much maligned.


Exhibit A. - Abnormal Position of Answering Machine

Exhibit A. Position of Answering Machine when I got home. (For reference, normal position of Answering Machine may be seen in the picture of the Plaintiff. Note the current lack of power lights.)


Exhibit B. - Power Cord

Exhibit B. The power cord of the answering machine. Exactly the position it was discovered in, about 8 feet away from the aforementioned answering machine.


Exhibit C. - Space beside Couch

Exhibit C. Space beside couch through which answering machine power supply may be accessed. (Couch moves somewhat easily; it's one of those boneless couches)


Exhibit D. - Plug location

Exhibit D. Normal plug-in point for answering machine, bottom plug. Note the vacancy of the bottom plug.


Exhibit E. - Bouncy Ball

Exhibit E. Bouncy ball that I totally forgot he even had as a toy which apparently rolled behind the couch a while back. Possibly even last year.


Chaos - Accused

The Accused: Chaos. Previously convicted on charges of illegally re-distributing dehydrated dairy products in the Great Indoor Powdered Milk Snowstorm of '93. Also known heavy catnip user.


Theoretical Re-enactment:

Chaos (The Accused) was home alone and bored. He remembered the bouncy ball (Exhibit E) which rolled behind the couch and decided today was the day to go after it.

Once Chaos wedged himself into the tiny space beside the couch (Exhibit C), he discovered that he could not back up, and therefore must proceed forward. Along his path, he encountered the power cord of the answering machine in its normal location (Exhibit D). Unable to step high enough to avoid it, he bulled straight through, taking the cord with him (Exhibit B). This in turn pulled the Plaintiff out of normal position, disconnected the cord from both the wall and the Plaintiff, thereby depriving the Plaintiff of power and rendering it incapable of performing its assigned function of confusing the hell out of telemarketers.

The final fully-stretched-straight-out position the cord was discovered in in the Exhibit B photo is unexplainable by human science. Attempts to contact a cat scientist have resulted in no practical information and more than a few hairballs.


Now that you have heard the evidence, you decide:

[Poll #1406966]


(Please Note: Regardless of verdict, Chaos will not actually be punished in any way. It may affect his treat allowance though.)

[identity profile] quettalinde.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 06:07 am (UTC)(link)
And this is why we love cats. XD

[identity profile] eilonwy.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 06:19 am (UTC)(link)
In my absence, Foster-Kitty-Dean managed to open 42 new Firefox tabs in my browser, all to "Firefox Help." At least... I think it was FKDean. Otherwise Firefox is trying to tell me something.

Also, Chaos is *verra* handsome. :)

[identity profile] spuffylvr3.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 06:55 am (UTC)(link)
Oh! adorable!

But, still... very guilty kitty ;-)

~Nicole

[identity profile] ciaranbochna.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 07:37 am (UTC)(link)
I am afraid guilty it is--but hey, all is fair in the joy of finding toys and evil cords;)

[identity profile] brigid-tanner.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 12:08 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL!!
aescu: (busy)

[personal profile] aescu 2009-05-28 12:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Well as long as your cat doesn't claim the computer (as my kids did when the were not able to even sit without help yet)... Who needs a pohne much less an answering machine? ;)

[identity profile] irismay42.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 02:51 pm (UTC)(link)
From the photograph, Chaos is quite obviously possessed by Azazel, thereby rendering him incapable of controlling his own actions. I therefore demand all charges be dropped forthwith against the defendant and the case summarily dismissed, m'lord.

[identity profile] babelmira.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 05:04 pm (UTC)(link)
CULPA!! Hang the cat!

*carefully. We don't actually want to hurt him*
aescu: (cheerful)

[personal profile] aescu 2009-05-28 06:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, Lisa once pulled Majordomo and whipe our whole raid... That's the fun you can only have with pets or babies...

[identity profile] bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
*laughing*

Well, that's cats. I love the look on Chaos's face! And you forgot a button; it was all the ball's fault! How dare that ball go hide where Chaos has trouble reaching it!

And you do know that everything you own also belong to your cat, right? So what if he decided to disconnect the answering machine? It's half his answering machine too!

I'm laughing so hard I've got tears coming out of my eyes.

Yup, that's cats. Everytime the cat knocks something off the top of the China cabinet, I say they're re-decorating. "I don't like this rag doll up here." *punt* That's why only unbreakable stuff is allowed on top of the cabinet, and all the breakable stuff is inside the cabinet. With the doors closed.

When you have cats, you sort of have to just plan around them.

(^_^)/
BEM

[identity profile] bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 06:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Hey, at this website icanhazcheezburger.com , I saw this really funny poster design. It was done up as a motivational poster. The picture was of a cat sitting on a keyboard. The large caption read LINUX and the small caption said, "Stopping kitten butt logins since 19??" I don't remember the date on that.

And maybe your cat was trying to access a cat discussion board, where they discuss their plans to rule the human world.

[identity profile] bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 07:00 pm (UTC)(link)
OMG! I was fostering a momma cat with kittens once. The kittens were doing that romping around playing Mucha Lucha or whatever it is, and I was on the computer. Then all of a sudden, the computer just went black. I wriggled the mouse, and realized the fan was off. As was the little light on the monitor. And that funny little light on the tower.

So I looked behind the computer at the powerstrip on the floor. The darned kittens had managed to turn off the powerstrip!

Maybe I should mention that I don't really like computer mice, I prefer trackballs. However the one time I had a track ball, the cats discovered it, knocked it out and took off with it.

Didn't find that darned ball for more than a year.

(^_^)/
BEM

[identity profile] ciaranbochna.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 07:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Exactly! His home, must prevent the evildoers from getting in, by phone or door;)

[identity profile] eilonwy.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
And maybe your cat was trying to access a cat discussion board, where they discuss their plans to rule the human world
Hm. Maybe. And if it were my Widget (see icon) I would *totally* believe that! This was my foster kitten, though-- so maybe he was trying to access discussion boards to find himself a permanent home!

[identity profile] eilonwy.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 10:22 pm (UTC)(link)
He's not letting it go to his head.
Oh that's good. :) No one likes a kitty with a swollen ego. Um, wait... don't *most* kitties have big egos? Al of mine do... :D

[identity profile] bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 11:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Hey, quettalinde! I like that icon, that guy has such a rakish smirk/smile.

[identity profile] bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com 2009-05-28 11:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, that might have been it! He was trying to register on Petfinder.com.

[identity profile] malevolent73.livejournal.com 2009-05-29 04:15 am (UTC)(link)
The answering machine has obvious evil overtones.

[identity profile] quettalinde.livejournal.com 2009-05-29 04:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. :) Robert Downey Junior's pretty awesome.

[identity profile] rift-mage.livejournal.com 2009-05-31 07:58 am (UTC)(link)
Chaos cannot be held culpable for a deed that is part of his very nature and while the plaintiff may seem innocent of any blame, how can we be sure? I rule that the one at fault is the bouncey ball, utilising a cunning plan to force misplaced suspicion.

[identity profile] bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com 2009-06-01 06:10 pm (UTC)(link)
The bouncy ball is really an alien from another planet, collecting information on Earth for future invasion plans.